Veggie Chili

Behold the culinary masterpiece that is Veggie Chili! Throw a bunch of shit in the pot and let it turn into chili! Delicious, delicious chili! This is one of those household recipes that I stopped measuring stuff for a long time ago. So this is my eyeball recipe; adjust for your weird tastes.

Ingredients:

• 3 cans of Ranch Style Beans (15oz)
  • You can also try Siete Vegan Charro Beans.
• 2 cans of Black Beans (15oz)
• 6 cans of Ro-Tel Tomatoes (10oz)
• 3 bags of Morningstar Farms Griller Crumbles (12oz)
  • If you can find the chorizo version, get that
• 1 can Chipotle Peppers in Adobo Sauce, chopped (7oz)
• 2 Red Onions (large or 3 medium)
• 2 bags of Carrot Chips (16oz)
  • Sometimes I get three bags because I use the carrot chips to determine the progress of the cook so I eat a lot of them
• 1 bag of Frozen Roasted Corn (12oz)
  • I don't usually put this in but if there's a bag in the freezer sometimes I'll add it.
• 10 'gloops' of Liquid Smoke
• 1 can or jug of Tomato Juice (64oz)
• 0.5 liters of Diet Dr. Pepper
  • Or Coke Zero or Coke Zero Cherry, etc.
• Delicious Cumin to taste
• Ground Coriander to taste
• Chili Pepper to taste

Serve with:

• Pico de Gallo
• Pickled Onions
• Hot Sauce
• Cheese
• Crusty Bread

Directions:

• Dump everything into your largest witch's cauldron. I make a lot of chili at once, so scale this recipe down as needed for your normal human needs.
• Bring to a boil, then to the lowest simmer.
• Now you are on Stir Patrol: stir that pot at least once every 15 minutes, all damn day. Cook. It. Down. If you don't, you will probably burn the bottom eventually.
• Then put it in the fridge overnight and do this again in the afternoon.
• Dinner is served.